What ALL I realized wading through my twenties!

“Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts”

Most of us had that point in life, when this quote and many of its likes it made sense.

Growing up sucks, I admit. It is better to live without responsibilities, a carefree life. You have no one to answer to, and losing & gaining is a part and parcel of the road to a perfect life.

But as I am into the 23rd year of my happy life, nowadays I feel good about growing up. I used to abhor the fact that I’m no longer a kid, to be pampered by people or the feeling that I can’t do inane activities while in front of people. But growing up has its own happy part. Things that I have learnt and realized make me feel happier, and much more why it is known as growing up.

1. Listen to the conscience, it speaks: Nothing can guide you like the little voice inside your head. And nothing can save you, like your instinct. When they speak, pay heed.

2. Never be afraid to speak your mind: If you feel strongly about something, speak up, act.

3. Not everyone is meant to stay in your life forever: The ones who truly matter, will anyhow manage to stay. And when people leave, there’ll be a reason to it. The reason you may not realize sooner, but definitely, at some time later, it’ll be clear.

4. Stay in touch: Family and friends are the ones who’ll be there forever. No support matches the support of family, and the love of true friends. Be thankful for them, and be for them when they need you.

5. Be grateful: Life is not bad, it is beautiful. God is wonderful. Live a thankful life, for God has bestowed some of the best things on you. Things you might not notice every now and then, things you take for granted.

6. It is okay to be a kid: We all were kids once, it is our basic nature. We learn to grow up. Don’t let the kid in you die. That innocence and jest makes your eyes sparkle, and life happier to deal with.

7. You are not born to please everyone: It is abs-effing-olutely OKAY if some people don’t like you. There’ll always be people who will have a problem with everything you do. It is fine if they do, they don’t know your life or you.

8. Never rush to grow up: Everything has its own time, and happens at its own pace. Doing things that make you look grow up, is not cool. Neither is doing drugs or smoking. They still kill. Never be in a hurry to portray yourself as a “grown up”. It is not a mask to be worn, it comes with maturity of thoughts. If you’re a baby at heart, be that. Don’t be coerced by others’ “grown up” activities.

9. Never forget your roots: Everything that taught you something when you were a kid, will always have its impact on your psyche. Remember it always. Parents are not your enemies, they never were. They just know better, they grew up like we did – on the same path. But their lives were simpler. Listen to them, respect them and always be thankful to them.

10. Be human: Compassion is our natural instinct. Respect the elders and the kids. They need care. Help people. Reach out to poor and the downtrodden. We are all leaves on the same tree.

11. Get over the past: There was a reason it did not make it to your present. Believe in that, and move on. Living in the past, and moping on it, will only make you sadder. You deserve to be happy, at each second. Forget the past and look forward to better things that are on the way.

12. Don’t judge people: Eccentric is nothing, and a reason shapes everything and everyone. There might be a reason why people did something, a story unknown to us.

13. Sing if you like to: You don’t have to be born A R Rahman, Lata Mangeshkar, Lana Del Rey or Eminem. If you love singing and like your voice, trust me, it’s more than enough. Sing to your heart’s content.

14. Don’t gossip: It never did anything good, never will.

15. Have a hobby: Yes, and facebook-ing is NOT one. It is a total waste of time, admit it. Sing, read, dance, write, be into gardening, pottery, and paper-making. Pick up anything that suits you, and indulge in it. It will leave you much happier at the end of a rough day.

16. Give up grousing: Bad days come so you learn to appreciate the good ones, and carping never helps. Days brighten on their own. Keep a smile, and spread many more. Every problem you face will have a solution to it!

17. It is okay if your friends, neighbors, cousins, juniors from school et al are getting married, and you’re still single: Yes it absolutely is. You can still smile, dance on their weddings before you get hitched and have to go for weddings as the ‘Missus’!

18. Shopping is fun: If you love clothes, go on a spree! No qualms on that. But be mindful of your spending habits. It’s not a problem to please your own self, but be thrifty. You know when you actually need something. And yes, once in a few months, a shopping spree doesn’t kill!

19. De-clutter: Your house, thoughts and life. Keep only what is needed. Too many things in your house and your mind thwart growth. Clothes, memories and grudges with people who let you down at some point earlier – you don’t have to live with those forever. Keep it less and simple! Live it light.

20. Keep your mind happy: Sad thoughts pull one down. Don’t let others’ behavior affect yours. It is a ripple effect, one sad thought, followed by many others - you become sad for the entire day. Don’t let your thoughts go unbridled. Half of what we think as our problems, barely even exists; it is all in the mind! The more negative we think, the more worried we make ourselves. It is very essential to live in the present! Live this moment, with much mirth.

21. It is okay to be by yourself at times – We need time to organize our thoughts. One does not need to be clinging to anybody and anything at every moment of the day. Also, take a break from the T.V., laptop, the smartphone matey. Breathe fresh air, smell the rain, enjoy a cup of coffee by yourself.

22. Never stop learning: Life is a teacher, so are books. There’s no paucity of anything to be learnt. Whatever be it - an art, craft, technology, a new language, take it up!

23. Take responsibility for all your actions: We are humans, beautiful in our imperfections. Admit mistakes, apologize when needed and carry a light heart. It is necessary to own up to our mistakes, even if it invites criticism from others.

24. Be a good friend: We come across a lot of wonderful people as we walk through life. Some of them become a part of our heart and soul. Friends make us happy, brighten lives and be with us whenever we need them. If they make us feel so good, don’t we deserve to be one! Even if it’s just some moments of your time, or just a shoulder to cry or an ear to listen, never deny someone who needs you. Listen to people, make them feel good about themselves!

25. There is still a lot to learn. Life is a beautiful gift, and God is watching over you! You are luckier than you can think, and yes you are awesome! :)